Work-Life Balance.. yeah, right.
Work life balance… it is like the promise that cake is calorie free. It sure sounds great doesn’t it?
The problem that I have always had with that statement is that it is positioned such that there is one perfect point along the continuum that will allow us to achieve harmony in all things. Frankly that is just a flat lie. There is no such point. Our lives are dynamic and things are constantly changing. Deadlines come and go along with moments of frenzy in our personal lives.
When I was introduced to this concept in my early twenties, it seemed to be the answer to literally everything; an epiphany of sorts. I worked hard at achieving it by setting boundaries with work responsibilities and setting expectations with family and friends about the limits to which I would be able to commit to events. I was single at the time with no kids and no real responsibilities outside of work, so in theory, it should have been easy. The problem was that I was always failing and feeling like I was disappointing everyone with myself being at the top of that list.
Work-Life balance is the imperfect relationship between two competing forces and one resource- you. Holding yourself to an arbitrary point in the continuum or walking that tightrope all the time is just creating more work for yourself. Everyone knows that if we are already trying to keep that “balance”, more work is the very last thing we need more of.
What I have found to work instead, is ensuring that I have enough time in the week to focus on myself through nature, meditation, art, reading, mindfulness, etc. When I dedicate this time to let my mind wander and wonder, the rest of the challenges come into more perspective. I am easily able to prioritize all of the tasks ahead and find the courage to adjust if I simply can’t meet the demands.
It hasn’t always been easy. Taking the time out for myself when there seemed to be so many other challenges that I “had” to tackle was sometimes the most difficult decision I had to make, but it was also the most rewarding. In the end, it made the balance easier to achieve.
When I think of this balance now, I don’t picture a fulcrum with one point in the center that would require a constant state of awareness and adjustment to keep from tumbling off. Now I picture a pool floaty on the water where I can easily and freely float to one side or the other when the waves demand it, and if I ever need a break from the churn, I simply stand up with my feet planted squarely on the bottom of the lake and pause.
Challenge
This week, schedule two hours of time where you do something just for yourself. Take a walk, get a massage, people watch at your favorite coffee shop. Whatever it is, connect with your thoughts and center yourself on that pool floaty.